Faculty Meeting News and Notes: April 4, 2019
The TL;DR The faculty began — but did not finish — a discussion on the proposed dual major in business Thursday afternoon. The plan calls for the major beginning during the 2020-21 academic year. The major would be capped at 60 students who would be selected based on academic performance. Provost Chris Zappe anticipates a need to hire two additional tenure-track faculty members and some part-time support to get the program...
Protesting ‘Implicit Racism’ in Art Curriculum, Students Remove Their Work from Juried Exhibition
By Gauri Mangala & Benjamin Pontz Student artists have removed nine of their works from the Juried Student Exhibition in Schmucker Art Gallery to protest what they say is the Art & Art History department’s failure to “recognize the voices of marginalized identities.” According to a letter sent to The Gettysburgian by Angelique Acevedo ’19 and Lars Healy ’20 on behalf of the protesting student...
April Fools: Nuclear Armageddon Imminent: Classes Held at the Discretion of Faculty
By Benjamin Pontz, Editor-in-Chief According to reports from scouts posted at lookout points atop the cupola and the Glatfelter bell tower, neighboring communities of Carlisle, Lancaster, and Emmitsburg have hunkered down ahead of an anticipated nuclear attack from North Korea. Spokespeople at those towns’ respective colleges — Dickinson, Franklin & Marshall, and Mount St. Mary’s — scoffed when reached by...
April Fools: 21 Ways to Use Gettysburgian Print Editions Besides Reading Them
By Ben and Josh, Almost an Ice Cream Brand Some traditions are meant to die. Promulgating misleading statistics about Greek Life participation to unsuspecting parents of prospective students, eating every meal after one’s first year at the Bullet Hole, and, yes, the biweekly ritual of printing a student newspaper. Gettysburg’s recent spate of budget cuts—Orwellianly dubbed “sustainable excellence”—has axed many anachronisms of a...
April Fools: Provost’s Office Successfully Bolsters Follicular Diversity, Adding Non-Bald White Male
By Benjamin Pontz, Non-Balding Editor Today is a landmark day in the Provost’s Office at Gettysburg College. Finally, they have hired a white man … that isn’t bald. Joining bald men Chris Zappe, Jack Ryan, and Rob Bohrer — Provost, Vice Provost, and Associate Provost respectively — is Matt Jones, joining as Assistant Provost for Provost’s Office Diversity. “We really felt we were lacking in terms of our white male...
