13 Places Safer than FIJI Basement on Friday Night: Number 11 will Shock You!

Editors' Note: This satire article is a part of The Gettysburgian's annual April Fools' special edition and is not a real news story.
(Screengrab from OSAGL fundraising video)

(Screengrab from OSAGL fundraising video)

By Josh Wagner, Opinions Editor

  1. The backstreets of Baghdad
  2. I-95 on foot at 2:00am
  3. Smyser Parking Lot without a Carlisle St. parking permit
  4. A pit of vipers
  5. Donald Trump’s Cabinet
  6. OJ Simpson’s bedroom
  7. The DMZ between North and South Korea
  8. An Egyptian ballot against Sisi
  9. Putin’s stable
  10. The extras’ dressing room on the Cosby Show
  11. Hanson basement
  12. Ron Wiafe’s office
  13. A coastal city in 30 years

April Fools’ Edition

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Author: Joshua Wagner

Josh Wagner '19 is a chemistry and mathematics double major who enjoys bike rides on the battlefield and waving around a red pen as the Gettysburgian's Managing Opinions Editor. When not editing for the Gettysburgian, he can usually be found working in the College Life Office, helping students with calculus as a PLA, or studying in the library.

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1 Comment

  1. Not funny.

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