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April Fools: Marching Band Beats Gettysburg Football Team
Apr01

April Fools: Marching Band Beats Gettysburg Football Team

By Ethan Silverstein, Staff Writer Last Saturday at Shirk Field, the Gettysburg College Football Team and the Gettysburg College Marching Band squared off. The game was off to an odd start when the PA announcer asked everyone to stand for the national anthem, but all the band musicians were on the field, which left no one to play the anthem. The football team had a strong start against the musicians. The musicians’ sizes did not...

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April Fools: College Announces Even More Renovations to the College Union Building
Apr01

April Fools: College Announces Even More Renovations to the College Union Building

By Taylor-Jo Russo, Staff Writer Just when you thought the construction was over, the college announces its plan to continue renovating and adding onto the College Union Building. While the details of what will exactly be completed are still unclear, there are rumors surrounding a new pool and potentially an indoor activities course which may or may not include a trampoline park. These additions are being created so students to have a...

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April Fools: Nuclear Armageddon Imminent: Classes Held at the Discretion of Faculty
Apr01

April Fools: Nuclear Armageddon Imminent: Classes Held at the Discretion of Faculty

By Benjamin Pontz, Editor-in-Chief According to reports from scouts posted at lookout points atop the cupola and the Glatfelter bell tower, neighboring communities of Carlisle, Lancaster, and Emmitsburg have hunkered down ahead of an anticipated nuclear attack from North Korea. Spokespeople at those towns’ respective colleges — Dickinson, Franklin & Marshall, and Mount St. Mary’s — scoffed when reached by...

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April Fools: Student Spotlight: “That Guy” in Every College History Class
Apr01

April Fools: Student Spotlight: “That Guy” in Every College History Class

By Lizzie Hobbs, Staff Writer “Let me just play devil’s advocate for a second…” Oh, what a wonderful phrase. Typically followed by something mildly controversial, not well thought out, and if you’re really lucky: borderline offensive to humanity. It is also the most used phrase by “that guy” in every history class. The amazing thing about “that guy” is the multitude of forms “that guy” can take. Age, race, gender, class, none of these...

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