ChatGPT Becomes the Newest Student Advisor

Editors' Note: This satire article is a part of The Gettysburgian's annual April Fools' special edition and is not a real news story.

By Katie Lauriello, Lead Copy Editor

After several years of development, the Center for Student Success is proud to announce students’ newest advisor: ChatGPT. As a generative AI, ChatGPT is able to provide students with the answer to any question they need or a draft to any paper they need to write. Not only that, but ChatGPT can attend to all students no matter how many there are or how far away they are. From any corner of the globe, ChatGPT will be there to help students with any of their needs.

The Center for Student Success found that despite the sixteen other advisors students have been assigned, some were still having trouble with keeping a balanced schedule. As a result, the office has opened its doors to new technology and artificial intelligence.

“We hope to see students find their coursework much more manageable with ChatGPT. It always has new ideas to help students,” said one staff member.

ChatGPT can help students save time effectively by crafting ideas for papers and assignments as well as finding information. Because of its nature as a generative AI, ChatGPT has the power to learn and absorb any and all data found on the internet and present it to students in a concise manner, no matter how unsourced and inaccurate it may be. 

“All I had to do was type in one prompt, and ChatGPT wrote an entire essay for me. I was able to spend some more time with my friends for the weekend,” Olive Evergreen ’26 said.

Students can find ChatGPT online for free with their Gettysburg login.

Author: Gettysburgian Staff

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